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Monday 28 August 2017

SHARKNADO 5: Global Swarming. July 2017.



We all know there's only one movie franchise in history that can not only survive jumping the shark but positively thrive on it. And that's the Sharknado franchise which would take such a development and turn it into a major selling point.

And so it is that, amazingly, we've now got a fifth addition to the series that makes you feel like you must have had a lobotomy in order to have agreed to watch it.

But watch it you will because only a lunatic doesn't want to see sharks dissected by chainsaws, in mid flight.

And I'll say it, right here and now, that is the greatest trailer ever made - for the greatest film of all time. You can stick your Citizen Kane; this is how movies should be.

It's been four days since my last post on here, not because I had something better to do with my time - I never have anything better to do with my time - but simply because the only trailers released in those dark and dismal days have been for movies that all look and sound exactly the same and have trailers that look and sound exactly the same. Seriously, I'm convinced they've just been re-releasing the same trailer every day with a different film title attached to it. But at last, I've found a promo with the wit to be different, one that realises that trailers are supposed to stand out, not fit in and, for that, as well as its sheer gleeful stupidity, I love it.

Admittedly, the film was unleashed upon the world over two weeks ago, so it's a bit late to be reviewing the trailer but I'm so happy to see it that I don't care. That's the kind of man I am.

Sharknado 5: Global Swarming movie poster

3 comments:

Anonymous said...

Why do I have the feeling that the entire film was greenlit as soon as someone came up with the title Global Swarming?
Still, Steve - if you say its not quite as boring as all the other rubbish coming out, that's good enough for me.

-sean

Steve W. said...

I'm starting to suspect that every trailer is made by the same person because they're genuinely all the same as each other. It does quickly start to create the impression that virtually all films come off a production line.

Anonymous said...

They don't call it the film industry for nothing.

I know what you mean though - I watched a trailer for the Bladerunner sequel the other day and even though thats one film you'd think didn't need to sell itself by coming across the same as the rest it still failed dismally to stand out.
(Which doesn't necessarily mean the film itself won't be any good of course, but... I'm not getting my hopes up)

-sean

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